Have you ever felt uneasy to ask someone for help? It’s quite easy when we’re talking about close friends and family but when it’s about asking someone we don’t really know that well, things become tricky.

The truth is most people like to help. The trick is how to ask. When it comes to using your connections – any connection – the trick is to ask generic questions rather than a direct approach. I have learnt that tip – and used it successfully – when I was looking for a job in New Zealand from overseas. When you’re sitting thousands of miles away, sending CVs or responding to ads simply doesn’t work. So I quickly decided to change my approach. I searched on LinkedIn for foreign accountants and business advisors in Aotearoa I had something in common with (whether we were from the same country, had a language in common and were members of the same accounting body) and I sent them a message to ask them how they were enjoying New Zealand and how they managed to get into the country. I made it about them. Then when the contact was created, I asked them if they knew anyone recruiting or if they could give me any tip. And the response was amazing. People I had never met went the extra mile, took of their time to respond in detail, put me in contact with their network. I was blown away. And within a few weeks I had secured a job.

This was about a job but the same applies to business insight, needed introductions, feedback, experience in an area we need to know about, recruiting. Anything really. The most successful people all agree to say that one of the secret to their success was learning from others.

If you think of your network, how have you reacted when someone has asked you for advice? The truth is most of us are willing to share our experience. We might even feel flattered to be asked.  Now trickier, when is the last time you’ve asked someone for their insight? Instead of being embarrassed or shy to ask, think of it the other way: you’re giving the opportunity to someone else to give their opinion and to do something that will make them feel good about themselves, which is to help someone else. And people will often give you access to their network, with the golden ticket – a personal introduction.

We can all learn and grow from others. And we all get a kick from helping others. So don’t be shy, ask. And never underestimate the power of connections.